August 14, 2024

I’ve been thinking about it for some time now, but I should write down as much as I know about myself and what I am capable of, to use as a benchmark for what we may be able to expect of you, my children. As you all grow, and develop, we learn more and more about you every day. Kiara, with your shapeshifting, to Mina with your empathic abilities. Damir, you’ve always been so strong, your grip on Gabriella tight as stone as you’d feed. It’s even still a challenge to get your bottle from you, despite it being empty and your face going pink from sucking on it so hard… 

 We’ve learned so much about you, my children, and yet there is still so much we don’t know, or even what to expect. So, with this entry, I will go over everything I can do as a full-blooded vampire. My abilities, strengths, weaknesses – all of it. There isn’t a lot in accurate vampire and Dhampir documentation around, understandably, so my hopes are we can use this to learn about us all. It’s a miracle in its own right we could have you three to begin with, after all. 

 Where do I start… 

 Well, so, my bloodline comes from the Void itself. My “father” was a powerful Voidsent known as Diabolos. I was once a mortal girl, who drank the blood of Diabolos to become what I am now. I was not born of the void, but I am more of a creature from there now, than I am a normal woman. 

   

 I do not age in the normal sense, and my body regenerates from most wounds easily. A small cut vanishes in seconds. Slices and gashes heal in a matter of minutes. I can remove limbs and reattach them with ease, and can even cut my chest open, and pull out my black heart. 

 My hair still grows, as do my nails. I dye my hair now, though naturally it is red, like how some of your hair is turning. Mina, I think you will have hair like mine. We can already see the crimson shine in the light as it grows. 

 My canines are longer, and sharp, as you’d see in any storybook vampire. They don’t disappear, or change, or hide; they’re always visible. You three will likely be teething soon, and I am so excited to see if any of you get fangs, or how they look. It’s such a silly thing, but I’m looking forward to it. 

 My eyes glow a bright red, and I have really good night vision. All of my senses are rather strong. I can see very well at night, or in the dark, though not as well during the day, when we’re outside. My sense of hearing is powerful. When we’re at the cottage, I can hear across the lake, and even the animals at Nana’s house. I can hear each of you sleep, you tiny breaths helping me rest. Heh, Damir, you snore, my son. It’s the cutest thing to me, too. Kiara, you breath so rapidly… and Mina, you’re so quiet. 

 My sense of smell is also very, very strong… unfortunately. Makes for a really rough diaper change time… but outside of that, everything smells so strong, and I can follow trails left behind. It’s also what lead me to your mother while she was away on Tural… her scent left behind in all the places she’d been. 

 Speaking of senses, Damir and Mina, I don’t know if you can feel it yet, or perhaps you do, but don’t fully understand it, but I can sense your exact location at any given moment – part of our shared blood bond. You two have a bit more of me in you than Kiara does, and through that, we have our connection. I hope that one day, you two may be able to use that as guidance, to never feel alone, and to always be able to find home. Sweet Kiara, that doesn’t make you any less special, however. You’re so much like Gabriella… and your scent is just as unique. While I cannot sense you like the other two, I can always follow your trail, and know where to find you. 

 I also have a bond with my childe. Though they are called Childe, that doesn’t make him my son, or child, it’s just the term used for siring a vampire. I have only ever turned one person into a vampire. Your uncle, Star. I offered him power, and through that, turned him into a vampire. Because of that, we have a similar bond as I do with you, Damir and Mina. I can sense him, and to an extent, even command him. Something I have only ever done once… cause I was mad… 

 Outside of my senses, my physical abilities are slightly enhanced. I am a little stronger than average, and faster than the average person. I can break into a cloud of bats when I sprint, and sprout bat-like wings from my back to protect myself. I have a greater reserve of stamina compared to most people as well, capable of fighting and casting magic for far longer than most people. 

 When I was a mortal girl, my aether was naturally powerful. I was a skilled mage in my youth, and my corruption only enhanced that. With the void corruption of my soul and aether, my magics changed as well. Much of my healing magics became blood magics, using my vitae to mend the wounds of my allies. 

 Reading this all back, it’s all a lot of what I can do, and almost seems like I can do anything… I’m strong, but I’m not invincible, much as I’d like to think I am. 

   

 While I don’t know what exactly can kill me, I do know what can hurt. Damage to my heart is currently the thing I know to be the most painful. I can pull my heart out which stings some, but any damage to it, inside or outside of my body is intense pain. During my turning process, after I had drunk the blood, the cultists stabbed me with a ritual knife through my heart, effectively killing the mortal me. 

 My heart still has the scar on it from the wound. Only part of me that has a scar. 

   

 Oh, sunlight! 

 The old stories mention how our kind would burn in the sunlight. Well, that is untrue. Sunlight does not cause us to combust, however it can harm me without the right protection. 

 Someone once said the eyes were the gateway to the soul, and that seems to remain true. When I step outside, direct sunlight in my eyes causes a stinging feeling at first. If I don’t over my eyes, after a few hours, it can lead to blindness. After that, my eyes burn, and I haven’t tested beyond that. I can imagine if I stand uncovered in the sunlight for long enough, my eyes may burn, and could cause permanent damage, however I am not willing to try that, nor is it correctly documented anywhere. 

 I mentioned my wings earlier, and an obvious question would be “Can I fly?” 

 Sadly, I cannot, at least not with those wings. They are merely for defense and intimidation and offer me no flight capabilities. That said, it’s not impossible for another be to able to fly with their wings, I however, just cannot. I have been able to shapeshift, however. I have a bond with a bat, a clever little one who joins my body and allows me to take his form. By becoming a bat, I can fly around freely. 

 My greatest weakness of all is my hunger. As the stories go, vampires are monsters who need to feed on the life essence of the living. Essence of the living is a vague statement, however. For me, it’s blood, and aether. Which in this case, are one and the same. The blood contains the aether I need to sustain myself. If I go too long without, I can feel myself becoming physically weaker, and more tired. My magics aren’t as strong, my physical abilities are weaker, my stamina is nearly entirely gone. 

 If I go long enough without feeding, I feel myself getting sleepier, and sleepier until eventually, I imagine my body would give out, and I’d fall into a deep sleep. The only thing that would wake me from that state, would be fresh blood. 

 That… is everything I can think of right now. This is all so disorganized, and hard to fully understand, I’m sure. I had to write everything I could think of, and that I know about. I hope that we can use all of this to learn about you three, what powers and abilities you all gain, and I can't wait to see you grow.